Creating Experiences That Help Relationships Thrive

Confessions of Faith: Breaking Soul Ties

Guest Blogger: Faith Simone  (@FaithSimone2011) 

I’m about to go in on a touchy subject, soul ties. And I’ve gotta say, I’m not too comfortable with it.

But I’ve been around long enough to know that when I’m afraid to speak, the words I have to say will have the most impact for someone. So I speak them anyway.

I do it because I know that someone needs to hear these words, feel them, and tuck them away right next to their own quiet shame or sour bitterness or red-hot rage. Until they’re ready to let it all go, walk into the cool calm waters of acceptance, and float on the weightless glory of forgiveness.

What’s The Price of a Soul Tie?

I’m talking to church folk on this one. Backsliders in general, women with emotional baggage in particular. Soul ties is a phrase tossed around in pulpits, written in the pages of books clutched desperately by those seeking answers…and those seeking deliverance.

  • But what does it really mean?
  • What does it really cost?
  • What’s the price for a soul tie and how can a sista’ get a refund?

Because if you’ve ever been caught up in a spiritual tug of war, you’re going to want everything you sacrificed for that war back. With interest.

I Vowed To Follow Someone…

I’ve been there. It’s embarrassing to admit how easily I allowed my soul to be knit together with someone who hadn’t earned the right to share its space. I cringe when I think of how I vowed to follow someone without even thinking of where they were heading. Without any consideration of my own path, my own divinely given directions.

At the time, all I cared about was being with him. Which wouldn’t have been a totally bad thing, if being with him brought me closer to Him.

That’s where the war began.

The Unseen Battle

Unseen battles between God’s spirit, my own selfish will, and the constant confusion of a man who wasn’t privy to the fact that he had claimed a woman who belonged to Someone else. By the time we both figured out that what we had wasn’t what either of us wanted, the damage was done.

We both had battle scars.

Mine came in the form of bitterness, loss of self-esteem, anger so white-hot that I scared myself at times. His…well, his aren’t for me to tell. 

What I can tell you is how I made it through.

How I Made It Through

I can tell you how I’ve gotten to the place where I can smile to myself when no one’s watching; how I plucked out bitterness, taking note of its nasty deep roots; how I reclaimed my self-esteem; how I decided that anger had over stayed its welcome.

I re-tied my soul to God.

Oh, it didn’t happen overnight. I cut a fool, y’all.

I sucked my teeth and cut my eyes at Him. Raged at Him and questioned Him. Blamed Him and him and me. Humbled myself before Him. Repented to Him. Whispered to Him with tears in my eyes; asked for a new heart and another chance. Bathed in the affirmations of His holy word.

Messed up, went back, and repeated the whole process all over again.

God is Faithful, Even When We Aren’t

It’s like that sometimes. But you know what I discovered? He’s faithful, even when we aren’t. So if you’re struggling with a soul tie and think you can’t make a come back, think again.

“Know therefore that the LORD your God is God; he is the faithful God, keeping his covenant of love to a thousand generations of those who love him and keep his commandments.” Deuteronomy 7:9 NIV

He’s in covenant with you.

Knowing Your Worth

A covenant of love to a thousand generations. That’s worth working to keep His commandments. That’s worth pursuing. That’s worth sacrificing for. You’re worth more. You’re worth a holy covenant and a man who has to seek God’s approval to claim you.

  • You’re worth the wait.
  • You’re worth the pursuit.
  • You’re worth the effort.

If you’re reading this and don’t quite believe it, ask God to show you.

I promise He’ll blow your mind. He’ll let you see yourself through His eyes, and when that happens you can’t help but to expect better. Demand better. Be better. Which means when the right one comes along, or if he never comes along, you’re alright. Because you’ve got it, the real thing.

The best thing: knowledge of God’s amazing love for you.

# # #

FaithSimoneBookCoverNote from the other Simone: I’m SO grateful Faith stopped by to share with to us. She is one of my best online writer friends. In her book, When The Real Thing Comes Along, we see the effect of soul ties on Jacelynn…who battles unresolved hurt. Things get crazy when Jacelynn’s past interrupts the present, and she has to learn to reconcile herself to Christ alone.

Faith Simone is a poet, playwright and novelist. She is also an active blogger, sharing her personal thoughts, book reviews and tips for writers on her website FaithSimone.com.  She is passionate about using her gift of writing as a tool to help promote humanity, understanding and compassion.

Faith Simone will be with us to talk about her book and soul ties via conference call on Tuesday, October 27th . If you’re a subscriber you’ll automatically get the details in your inbox. If not, subscribe AND get our free guide. 

10 Comments

  1. Faith Simone

    Thanks for featuring me Simone! I’m so glad that God connected us and I’m looking forward to the conference call. 🙂 I have a feeling it’s going to get all kinds of real on that thang!
    Faith Simone recently posted…Confessions of Faith: Special Edition (Soul Ties)My Profile

    • Simone

      Hey Faith! It’s an honor to have you here. God is so good to connect us…and you are one of the reasons I should have joined social media MUCH sooner (insert sigh). I have SO much expectancy about the call too! I don’t know what He’s going to do…but I’m looking forward to it.

  2. Tiffany

    Praise God thank you for being transparent and sharing truth. ❤️

    • Simone

      I agree! And I’m SO grateful for Faith tackling this topic, because soul ties is something I struggled with too. Thanks for stopping by, Tiffany!

    • Faith Simone

      Transparency is what I strive for and I’m starting to accept that it’s one of my gifts (although it doesn’t always feel that way, lol). Thanks for your feedback, Tiffany. <3
      Faith Simone recently posted…Confessions of Faith: Special Edition (Soul Ties)My Profile

  3. Michelle Stimpson

    Hey Faith! You’re so right – when he have something important to say, the enemy comes to steal it. So glad you are so brave in Him!
    Michelle Stimpson recently posted…A Random Hair Twist-out VideoMy Profile

    • Simone

      (MICHELLE STIMPSON! Whoa…I almost fainted when I saw your name.) Yes, our enemy does come to steal, but when people like Faith speak truth…he loses ground. So grateful for her. I think that’s why the Lord is constantly reminding us to be “strong and courageous.” Thanks for stopping by, Michelle.

    • Faith Simone

      Aww, thanks Michelle! I don’t always feel brave, but like Simone said, I’m learning to be courageous. My mantra lately has been to feel the fear, but do it anyway. Each time I take a step of faith, I’m amazed by how God blesses me for my obedience. When that happens, I can stand #unashamed.
      Faith Simone recently posted…Confessions of Faith: Special Edition (Soul Ties)My Profile

  4. Quanie Miller

    I SO enjoyed reading this. Faith, I love your honesty and total willingness to be so vulnerable in order to help others heal. This sounds like a book all by itself. Like, seriously. Thanks for sharing, ladies!

    • Simone

      Thanks for stopping by, Quanie! I second that notion. This IS definitely a book topic. And it’s one of the lessons I picked up from When The Real Thing Comes Along. I wonder if that was intentional…

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