Creating Experiences That Help Relationships Thrive

Tag: Thanksgiving

How to Handle Holiday Stress

For some folks, the holidays are filled with family, love, and laughter. For others, the holidays are constant reminders of what is missing in your life. Either way, the holiday stress will probably visit you (despite the love, joy, and peace that should be the reason for the season).

Because someone is guaranteed to come at you wrong, steal your parking space, or tap dance on your last nerve. At least, that has been my experience:-). Here’s two ways to handle the holiday stress: resting and sowing. Continue reading

Dear Macy’s: Please Save Thanksgiving

Dear Macy’s,Thanksgiving is my absolute favorite holiday. It is all about food and family. In my family, my mom cooks the turkey, ham, macaroni and cheese, and everyone else makes the side dishes. For example, me and my dad make the yeast rolls, Isaac makes the mashed potatoes, Morris makes the brussel sprouts, etc. etc.  The day includes lots of food, laughing, and games. And until now, there have been no external forces competing for our family time together. And, that’s why you should close your stores. 

 

You and I have been friends for many years, and I always enjoy scouring the sales rack during the change of seasons. But, I fear your decision to open your doors for commerce on the evening of Thanksgiving is cause for concern.
I know, I know. All the other stores are doing it. But, if all the other stores decided to jump off the proverbial bridge does that mean you would too?
 

Let’s face it Wal-Mart and Toys R Us began encroaching upon Thanksgiving last year, but you…you are so much better than them. Wal- Mart is known for its low prices and questionable employment practices. And, Toys R US, well, they need all the help they can get. But you, dear Macy’s, have always been better than that. You appear to treat your employees with dignity, you hire veterans, and aside from that icky music video of Justin Bieber and Mariah Carey you and I are generally on good terms.

 

But, this decision to sacrifice the family time of thousands of employees for four more hours of commerce…could really damage our relationship.

I know full well the sacredness of Thanksgiving and Christmas to mall workers. (The only two days most malls are closed). Because, I worked at Kay Jewelers for six years. And, it is tough to be a mall worker during the holidays…the extended hours, the impatient shoppers, and the increased threat of theft. The mall is open 363 days a year.

Isn’t that enough?

Or do you plan to stop selling online during this period of time?

 

There is logic that says, “people are shopping on-line anyway, let’s bring them in the stores.” No, we should not bring them in the stores. Because, once you, dear Macy’s, fling your doors open for commerce on Thanksgiving Day more merchants will soon follow, and the damage will be irreparable.

 

You and J.C. Penny’s made the right decision last year. Couldn’t you make it again?
You may say it’s the evening, and we aren’t opening until 8:00 p.m.!
 

Even though, the store opens at 8:00 p.m., I imagine staff will have to arrive at 7:00 p.m. And, some employees commute an hour or more. So, they have to leave home at 6:00 p.m. But, it takes an hour to get dressed and look presentable. So, while their family is sitting down to relax and watch a ball game and enjoy dessert they will be ripped away from the festivities at roughly 5:00 p.m.

 

And, women that would normally be sequestered together with their unwanted in-laws, may now dip off to the mall in avoidance of that awkward silence. And, a golden opportunity for character building would have been missed.

 

And if you, Dear Macy’s, open your doors on Thanksgiving Day, your peers such as Nordstrom, Neiman Marcus, and Bergdorf Goodman will soon follow suite. Please save Thanksgiving, Macy’s. You have the
power to do so.

 

But, should you choose not to flex your influential muscle…I will not be shopping with you again until after the Christmas holiday. Nordstrom, TJ Maxx, and Ross made the right decision. So, there are plenty of moral shopping alternatives.

 

I’m sorry it, has to be this way, but the choice is yours.
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Dear Readerif you share my position on the Thanksgiving  retailing debacle, could you help me spread the word? Please pass this post along on your favorite social network. Who knows, we may just save some folks some time with family. Love, Simone

 

A Model Mother

If you have been following this blog for the past 19 months, you’ve meet 8 of my 12 family members.

My Family Fantastic

You’ve met my husband, dad, 4 of my 5 brothers, 1 of 2 sisters, and both my cute nephews. You have not read about my mom (Elizabeth), youngest sister (Shannel), or my fourth brother (Manny).

Let’s start with Elizabeth, because she is a model mother. My mother (a former Paris runway model) has lead quite an interesting life. She was chosen as one of a handful of students to integrate her school in 1964.  She then went on to become the first black homecoming queen of her university. Post-college Elizabeth went on to conquer the fashion world in Paris, Milan, and New York City.

Elizabeth in NYC Circa 1978

But then my dad (ever the salesman) convinced my mom to marry him and move down south. Elizabeth had  plans to be a fashion buyer for one of the local department stores, but then I arrived.

And, before I knew it…I had seven siblings and my family seemed quite strange in comparison to others.

Elizabeth home schooled most of us. Opted to have home births administered by midwives. Grew a lot of our food in the back yard. Eliminated the use of microwaves as a health precaution, and didn’t allow us to watch TV during the week. Looking back I can see that the tough decisions my mother made, shaped me and my siblings for the better. But, the strangeness of my family did not go unnoticed by our relatives.

As a result, most of our holidays were spent with just our clan. But, there is an upside to being isolated from extended family…me, my siblings, and my parents are a close-knit bunch.

I am especially close to my mother. Even though, I am married and live 700 miles away…we talk almost everyday. Whenever I go home for an extended period of time, my mother always finds time in her schedule to make my two favorite meals: spaghetti and fried fish. Because my mother is generous, kind, and enthusiastic. In fact, I can always tell when one of my siblings had a particularly challenging athletic event the evening before. Because she always sounds like an eighty-year old chain smoker when she loses her voice the day after.


Sometimes, however, my mother’s enthusiasm can get the best of her. I often tell her haste makes waste. Cut once measure twice. But, I think at this point she is just used to having 9 people depend on her. So, whenever she can get ahead of the game she aims to do so.

One such opportunity reared its head at Thanksgiving a few years ago, before I married Morris.

 

The Lifetime Wedding Planner

Thanksgiving is HUGE in my house, and it is the holiday that everyone tries to make it home for. We had all gathered around the table and were preparing to say the blessing, when my mother announced that she had a gift for me. My little sister ran to get the gift bag and handed it to me with a beaming smile.

The lovely gift bag held a beautiful book that my mother purchased on sale…The Lifetime Wedding Planner. It was complete with budgets, bows, envelopes and everything one needs to plan the perfect wedding. One minor problem. I wasn’t even dating anyone…and haven’t for several years. My five brothers erupted in laughter. And I, I wanted to crawl under a rock.Boy, did she get ahead of the game.

But, that book turned out to be quite handy when Morris and I got married last year.

I guess that’s what makes Elizabeth a model mother, because she thinks ahead and plans for what will be…not what is.

 

A Turkey Named Thursday

Morris and I picked out our Thanksgiving bird today. I named him Thursday, and he will be the crown jewel of our 1st Thanksgiving meal as a married couple. Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday, because it includes my favorite things: family, food, and fun.

At home, my mother cooks the turkey, stuffing, macaroni & cheese, and the pecan pies.  My dad and I make the yeast rolls. Isaac and Rebekah make the mashed potatoes and banana bread. Israel makes the Sock-It-To-Me-Cake (a recipe that is four generations old). Immanuel makes rice crispy treats. Michaela, Miriam, and Issachar make cookies and cakes. Honey Baked makes the ham. And, I can’t remember what Isaiah makes. But, you get the idea…everyone contributes something to the meal.

It’ll be tough to be away from my family for Thanksgiving. But, Morris and I still plan to have a feast. Our planned menu includes: Candied Yams, Green Beans, Kale, Yeast Rolls, Macaroni and Cheese, Stuffing, and Apple Pie. We are going to wait and see how everything turns out before inviting guests.

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